Fun Chaos with Tenchi

[Lucy]

Writing prompts. You can write a short story or even just a few lines. Be creative and have fun.

Carmen or The Chief left a mysterious object on your desk. What is it?

Lucy returns to her desk to find a note that just says From Weller attached to a cube like object. She sits down and begins playing with the thing, discovering it moves similarly to a Rubics Cube. As she plays with it, the woman loses track of time, and doesn't hear her watch timer go off. It is the end of the work day.

So as she's walking back to her dorm she's messing with it but doesn't get anywhere. Lucy ends up spending days on it, trying to figure it out and wondering why Weller left her the object. On the seventh day when she's playing with it, she hears a click.

Then sees one of the small sides open. There's a small charm inside in the shape of a rabbit. She picks it up and adds the charm to her keychain.

 

[Tenchi Masaki]

Tenchi was making his way to his office when he felt the urge to yell, "Easter eggs! Freeze-dried Easter eggs! Just when you thought commercialism couldn't get any worse, it told you to hold its root beer!" The timing was a little off, as Easter was months over by now, but Tenchi used it as an excuse to test his Egg Dryer Mk. 1. When the Easter holiday was over, all the unsold eggs were dried lickity split, and now they were being sold off to egg lovers everywhere.

Now all Tenchi had to do was drop his eggsplicit merchandise off at his office and make his way to the training room to try out new programs. He just needed a volunteer to give feedback, and after reviewing student files, he decided Lucy Sanchez would do. Tenchi sent Lucy a message asking her to volunteer, and if yes, to please go to the training room.

 

[Lucy]

Lucy's watch beeped, and she quickly scanned the message from Tenchi. A grin spread across her face as she snatched her keys and a half-eaten waffle, practically bouncing out the door.

Thirty minutes later, she arrived at the tech department, her energy barely contained.

“Hey, Tenchi! I’m here!” she called, her voice bright and eager.

 

[Tenchi Masaki]

I'm glad and a little surprised, actually, to hear that. The last test was public and quite explosive, but we don't need to go into details, because we need you to focus on the here and now, rather than when the previous volunteer is going to land. So with that, I'm proud to announce a non-explosive related training simulator! Now, agents will be able to improve their Carmen catching skills, or your money back!

This means that, since this is free, if it doesn't work, you'll get nothing for the training and nothing for the spending. But fret not, because as you should know, there is no such thing as a double negative, so you'll end up back where you started and get to try again until it works. But we shouldn't have any problems at this stage, so hop on in and get training!

 

[Lucy]

Lucy took a deep breath and slid into the console chair. She glanced at Tenchi, waiting to see what he’d say next.

Out of nowhere, the agent blurted, “Did you know some turtles can breathe through their butts underwater?”

 

[Tenchi Masaki]

Of course, and penguins think we are penguins too, but bigger and underdressed. When I found out penguins thought humans were penguins, I was happy to know that there were birds who accepted people's differences and fashion choices. We can't always wear tuxedos after all, but at least ACME Bird-net has a reason to invite them to the winter ball.

Unfortunately, this simulation doesn't have penguins or crime-fighting turtles, just a lot of loot, warrants, and crooks. Remember your training and you'll do just fine, barring any uncertain circumstances.

 

[Lucy]

Lucy cracked her knuckles. She leaned forward in the chair, bracing her hands on the console as if daring the simulator to throw its worst at her.

“Alright, Sensei Tenchi,” she said, her grin widening, “fire it up—I’m ready.”

 

[Tenchi Masaki]

The machine whirred to life and generated an empty white room with a door. Tenchi told Lucy that opening the door would lead to the virtual world on the other side, where any environment could be generated. To start, a beach was waiting on the other side of the door with a lovely blue ocean. All Lucy had to do was find the suspect hiding amongst the beachgoers.

Tenchi monitored the scene while the crook crept around, staying well hidden.

 

[Lucy]

Lucy stepped through the door, blinking at the sudden brightness. Waves rolled onto the shore, gulls squawked overhead, and a kid ran by with a dripping popsicle.

She squinted. A group of beachgoers were lounging under umbrellas, someone was selling coconuts, and another was applying sunscreen so thick they looked like a frosted cake. Lucy slowed her walk, eyes skimming the beach. The sunscreen statue? Just sun safety gone overboard.

Lucy’s eyes narrowed on a furious digger. Sand flew everywhere as he clawed at the beach like a pirate desperate to bury treasure.

Her heart skipped as she crept closer.

The man suddenly stood, brushed himself off, and plopped a tiny plastic flag on top of his mound.

“Sandcastle contest entry number 37!” he shouted proudly, waving to a row of judges holding clipboards.

Lucy blinked, “Okay. Not a crook. Just… very dedicated."

Lucy’s eyes narrowed as she spotted a man crouched near a beach umbrella. He kept glancing left, then right, before slowly cracking open a cooler. His shoulders hunched, his eyes darted, and then snap the lid shut again.

She crept a little closer, watching as he repeated the routine. Look around. Open lid. Shut it fast. His behavior screamed crook on the run.

Finally, she caught a glimpse inside as the lid opened wider than usual. Her brow furrowed.

Sandwiches.

Stacks of them. Ham, turkey, even peanut butter and jelly, all neatly wrapped.

Lucy blinked. “…Dangerous contraband: ham and cheese.”

Lucy noticed a man lying under an umbrella with a paperback novel. He wasn’t turning the pages normally — instead, he flipped back and forth every few seconds, eyes darting around like he was waiting for someone.

Lucy frowned. “Nobody reads that fast.”

She crept closer, But as she peeked, she saw the truth, the man wasn’t reading at all. He had tucked a crossword puzzle inside the book jacket and was muttering angrily at it.

“Seven letters, starts with Q… Why do they always use birds I’ve never heard of?” he grumbled.

Lucy blinked. “…A dangerous criminal mastermind… with a grudge against puzzles.”

Suddenly, the sky above the virtual beach flickered. One moment it was bright and sunny, the next… all black. A low, mechanical hum filled the air, and the crashing waves seemed to pause. Lucy froze, heart skipping.

“Tenchi?” she called into the comms. “Uh… something’s happening. The sky — it’s gone!”

 

[Tenchi Masaki]

As alarms beeped, Tenchi checked the data and reviewed subroutines. After verifying the results, Tenchi scanned the virtual landscape. Tenchi noticed the beach sand was sugar and the ocean was a little... jigglier than usual and informed Lucy of the current situation. Um. Lucy, apparently, the ocean is now blue raspberry jello with glitter added. I think I'll call it the "jellocean" for now. Now, I have an idea of who is responsible for this, and let's just say she's going to bed without dessert tonight.

Now, the good news is that this has resulted in unpredictable circumstances, which happen wherever Carmen goes. The bad news is there isn't a spoon big enough to eat the jellocean with, and almost as important, the crooks' getaway boat isn't going anywhere now, so feel free to bounce on over to it to investigate further.

 

[Lucy]

Lucy squinted across the shimmering blue wobble.
“Alright, Tenchi—if I disappear, tell HQ I was last seen heroically drowning in pudding.”

With a running start, she bounced across the jellocean—each step launching her a little higher until she landed on the crooks’ stranded boat with a wobbly thunk.

“Okay… it’s surprisingly stable,” she said, tapping the deck. The hull made a faint schlorp noise. “...Never mind, that’s unsettling.”

She leaned over the rail, peering at the rippling dessert below. “No sign of the crew. But someone left a trail of sugar crystals and—wait—is that a cherry on the anchor?”

Lucy pressed her earpiece. “Tenchi, I think I found your dessert culprit’s calling card. Either that or someone’s been binge-watching The Great British Bake-Off during heists again.”