Tenchi Masaki
ACME Ace Detective, Inventor
- Best answers
- 1
- AMA
- findcarmen.com
- Known Aliases
- Tenko(don't ask), Kami Jack, Guy Smart, Tenten
- Color #
- 035096
Ah the story of my guitar Djinn and my beginnings as a guitarist which were kinda embarrassing but it worked out in the end. Djinn: “Worked out? What worked out? You flopping around more cringingly than Marty McFly singing Johnny B. Goode?” Tenchi: “You know there are some things you could not mention in this story?” Djinn: “Oh you mean the story you decided to tell without my permission?“ Tenchi: “When did I need your permission?” Djinn: “The second you included me in it you twit!”
Tenchi: “So Djinn, can we start the flashback now?” Djinn: “Well why not? It’s not like your going to stop now is it? So let’s get this over with shall we?“
Strummin‘ to Outboppin’
Tenchi: “Once upon a time-“ Djinn: “Are you really starting a flashback like that! What are you mental?” Tenchi: “It all started when I wanted a guitar and my grandpa bought me a violin instead“ I was so upset that I wandered to the airport and left for America after all the careful planning an 8 year old could come up with of course!“ Djinn: “Which is none! Why are you still alive!? Tenchi: “The kami of luck shines upon me my dear friend.” Djinn: “If I had arms you’d be strangled.” Tenchi: “I‘m aware of that. So anyway back to the story...”
A bright eyed stow away hiding in the luggage compartment within a dog cage gets brought out onto American soil. I managed to give my best dog impression and barked to blend in with the rest of the dogs. “Bark, bark, woof!” After being taken inside the airport I got out of my dog cage and ran to the exit and to the closest guitar store. “Oh my gosh! America is so american!”
Djinn: That’s right folks! This is what you have to bloody look forward to in this farce of a memory! And we’re back to the story in 3, 2, 1... “ Tenchi wanders a little less aimlessly than usual since he’s on a mission to get a guitar. Soon he starts to sing what he thinks is a hit song in America... “If all the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops oh what a rain it would be! Standing outside with my mouth open wide! Ah ah ah ah, ah ah ah, ah ah ah!“
Just then Tenchi comes across a 5 and dime and goes inside with all the enthusiasm of a child who expects to get what he wants without any real effort! ”Wow an American store in America! Give me a guitar please!“ It would be nice if the clerk on duty could simply say no and tell him to leave, but all he heard was... “Anata no Amerika no mise wa totemo Amerika-tekidesu! Gitā o kudasai!“ Teenage Clerk: “Look kid I don’t know what you said but if you don’t have a hot Japanese sister here with you, you’ll have to leave.“ Tenchi using the power of being a child, could naturally understand when a grown up said yes or no.
So Tenchi began to draw a guitar on construction paper and showed it to the clerk. Teen Clerk “ Oh you want a guitar well we have a half broken crappy one that your too young and foreign to know not to buy, so here ya go 50 buckio er um, dollaroko... sigh whatever they call 50 dollars in Japan.“ Tenchi having saved his allowance money gave the clerk 5500 yen having memorized basic currency conversion rates. “Arigatō, amerikahito!” Tenchi left the store with his used guitar and began to properly wander aimlessly having achieved his goal or so he thought, as being a crappy used guitar it wasn’t exactly in working order. “Why won’t this play like on tv? I want to play “Ai o oboete imasuka ka”.
Just then for reasons we shouldn‘t question, 50’s style rock music started playing in the background when Tenchi turned around he saw a group of boys all wearing black leather jackets and pants their leader was wearing sunglasses and was eying Tenchi with a smug look of indifference. “Well well boys looks like we got a wannabe rocker here! Newsflash chump, this is the Bopper gangs block and we don’t recall saying you get to play here! Tenchi having no idea what they were saying decided to go Back to trying to play his new crappy guitar. ”Watashi wa gitarisuto no ō ni narimasu!” Fortunately being California there was a lot of Japanese such as one of the bopper gang named Naoya who translated what I said. But that did not make things any better.
“You? Don’t make me laugh! I’m the Big Bopper Jr. and I’m the future king of guitars around here, and don’t you forget it!” Tenchi sensing a challenge prepared to outbop the Bopper! Fortunately Tenchi had been practicing guitar strumming on his violin when his family wasn’t around. They were essentially the same except... not really (just imagine a child using a violin like a guitar while doing the duck walk). And so it was on! People came from far and wide... from the surrounding 400ft radius anyway to see something that was mildly entertaining from an adult perspective.
The Bopper gathered his gang and set up their instruments. “It’s time to show this chump the power of elephant rock! Rock and roll is here to stay! But your not!“ Thus began a musical performance that was the best a bunch of 8-10 year olds could put on! As usual the adults forced to witness these moments were required to be encouraging no matter how bad. Adult Crowd: Rock on Bopper gang! Your all winners not losers! Eat your veggies and drink warm milk before bed! Remember to floss and don’t be afraid of the dark! The Bopper feeling his leadership was being challenged shouted “Silence! The Bopper makes the rules not you, and veggies suck!”
“Can I take back control of my story please” Djinn: Go for it, I’ve embarrassed you enough this evening. So anyway seeing my chance I started to play Johnny B. Goode since I never had a chance to play with a band before. The Bopper however saw things differently... Bopper Jr.: “What do you think your doing! This is my gang! You think you can outbop the Bopper!? But since I had been practicing on violin I was actually mediocre as opposed to outright bad. This caught all those witnessing off guard and these Californians thought they might actually get a good street performance outside of a New York subway.
The Bopper started playing along too, desperately trying to regain control of his gang but since he was only kinda mediocre I managed to edge him out as well as be able to play while doing my best guitar moves! Of course this wasn’t something to be proud of as you can imagine a bunch of kids trying to one up each other in a musical performance. However supportive as always the adults were cheering and saying in repetition... Adult Crowd: “Take out the trash, do your homework, Take out the trash, do your homework!“ By this time I was doing whatever kid moves I felt like doing and so was the Bopper gang. When the song was over Bopper Jr. fell to his knees and screamed I’ve been OUTBOPPED!!! Mommy! It’s not fair, he’s stupid and I’m better than he is!“
Just then my grandpa Katsuhito appeared from the crowd behind me and said “I think it’s time for you to say bye to your new friends Tenchi.” Not being surprised since my grandpa always finds me when I wander away. I said “Hi grandpa! I defeated my rival and brought honor to the Masaki family!“ Katsuhito: “If you say so Tenchi. You know your grounded for quite some time for this.” Bopper Jr. having regained his composure defiantly declared “You may have won this round, but the next time Bopper Jr. is gonna rock you out!“ And with that the Bopper gang disappeared into the crowd. I went back to Japan with my grandpa and he didn’t tell my parents what I did since they would probably schedule regular time with a child therapist and then, grandpa couldn’t train me when he wanted.
I decided to make an A.I. to help me learn to play guitar. Djinn: Oh you mean me? Why thank you Jackie boy! Tenchi: “Must you call me that?” Djinn: Well yes it’s easier for a guitar with a British accent to say.” Anyway my grandpa said I wouldn’t be playing anything until I learned violin first. So basically, I got my first real six string, bought it at the 5 and dime, played it till my fingers bled, was the summer of um... 2009. Djinn: “First of all, that story was bollocks! Second, It was 2004 not 2009!” Tenchi: “Yeah well that rhymed better. So dear readers who kept reading past the gumdrops song, thank you for hearing how I got my guitar Djinn. Djinn: “And this is Djinn formally apologizing for this humiliating tale. And now we leave you with these words: “Be excellent to each other, and party on dudes!
THE END
Tenchi: “So Djinn, can we start the flashback now?” Djinn: “Well why not? It’s not like your going to stop now is it? So let’s get this over with shall we?“
Strummin‘ to Outboppin’
Tenchi: “Once upon a time-“ Djinn: “Are you really starting a flashback like that! What are you mental?” Tenchi: “It all started when I wanted a guitar and my grandpa bought me a violin instead“ I was so upset that I wandered to the airport and left for America after all the careful planning an 8 year old could come up with of course!“ Djinn: “Which is none! Why are you still alive!? Tenchi: “The kami of luck shines upon me my dear friend.” Djinn: “If I had arms you’d be strangled.” Tenchi: “I‘m aware of that. So anyway back to the story...”
A bright eyed stow away hiding in the luggage compartment within a dog cage gets brought out onto American soil. I managed to give my best dog impression and barked to blend in with the rest of the dogs. “Bark, bark, woof!” After being taken inside the airport I got out of my dog cage and ran to the exit and to the closest guitar store. “Oh my gosh! America is so american!”
Djinn: That’s right folks! This is what you have to bloody look forward to in this farce of a memory! And we’re back to the story in 3, 2, 1... “ Tenchi wanders a little less aimlessly than usual since he’s on a mission to get a guitar. Soon he starts to sing what he thinks is a hit song in America... “If all the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops oh what a rain it would be! Standing outside with my mouth open wide! Ah ah ah ah, ah ah ah, ah ah ah!“
Just then Tenchi comes across a 5 and dime and goes inside with all the enthusiasm of a child who expects to get what he wants without any real effort! ”Wow an American store in America! Give me a guitar please!“ It would be nice if the clerk on duty could simply say no and tell him to leave, but all he heard was... “Anata no Amerika no mise wa totemo Amerika-tekidesu! Gitā o kudasai!“ Teenage Clerk: “Look kid I don’t know what you said but if you don’t have a hot Japanese sister here with you, you’ll have to leave.“ Tenchi using the power of being a child, could naturally understand when a grown up said yes or no.
So Tenchi began to draw a guitar on construction paper and showed it to the clerk. Teen Clerk “ Oh you want a guitar well we have a half broken crappy one that your too young and foreign to know not to buy, so here ya go 50 buckio er um, dollaroko... sigh whatever they call 50 dollars in Japan.“ Tenchi having saved his allowance money gave the clerk 5500 yen having memorized basic currency conversion rates. “Arigatō, amerikahito!” Tenchi left the store with his used guitar and began to properly wander aimlessly having achieved his goal or so he thought, as being a crappy used guitar it wasn’t exactly in working order. “Why won’t this play like on tv? I want to play “Ai o oboete imasuka ka”.
Just then for reasons we shouldn‘t question, 50’s style rock music started playing in the background when Tenchi turned around he saw a group of boys all wearing black leather jackets and pants their leader was wearing sunglasses and was eying Tenchi with a smug look of indifference. “Well well boys looks like we got a wannabe rocker here! Newsflash chump, this is the Bopper gangs block and we don’t recall saying you get to play here! Tenchi having no idea what they were saying decided to go Back to trying to play his new crappy guitar. ”Watashi wa gitarisuto no ō ni narimasu!” Fortunately being California there was a lot of Japanese such as one of the bopper gang named Naoya who translated what I said. But that did not make things any better.
“You? Don’t make me laugh! I’m the Big Bopper Jr. and I’m the future king of guitars around here, and don’t you forget it!” Tenchi sensing a challenge prepared to outbop the Bopper! Fortunately Tenchi had been practicing guitar strumming on his violin when his family wasn’t around. They were essentially the same except... not really (just imagine a child using a violin like a guitar while doing the duck walk). And so it was on! People came from far and wide... from the surrounding 400ft radius anyway to see something that was mildly entertaining from an adult perspective.
The Bopper gathered his gang and set up their instruments. “It’s time to show this chump the power of elephant rock! Rock and roll is here to stay! But your not!“ Thus began a musical performance that was the best a bunch of 8-10 year olds could put on! As usual the adults forced to witness these moments were required to be encouraging no matter how bad. Adult Crowd: Rock on Bopper gang! Your all winners not losers! Eat your veggies and drink warm milk before bed! Remember to floss and don’t be afraid of the dark! The Bopper feeling his leadership was being challenged shouted “Silence! The Bopper makes the rules not you, and veggies suck!”
“Can I take back control of my story please” Djinn: Go for it, I’ve embarrassed you enough this evening. So anyway seeing my chance I started to play Johnny B. Goode since I never had a chance to play with a band before. The Bopper however saw things differently... Bopper Jr.: “What do you think your doing! This is my gang! You think you can outbop the Bopper!? But since I had been practicing on violin I was actually mediocre as opposed to outright bad. This caught all those witnessing off guard and these Californians thought they might actually get a good street performance outside of a New York subway.
The Bopper started playing along too, desperately trying to regain control of his gang but since he was only kinda mediocre I managed to edge him out as well as be able to play while doing my best guitar moves! Of course this wasn’t something to be proud of as you can imagine a bunch of kids trying to one up each other in a musical performance. However supportive as always the adults were cheering and saying in repetition... Adult Crowd: “Take out the trash, do your homework, Take out the trash, do your homework!“ By this time I was doing whatever kid moves I felt like doing and so was the Bopper gang. When the song was over Bopper Jr. fell to his knees and screamed I’ve been OUTBOPPED!!! Mommy! It’s not fair, he’s stupid and I’m better than he is!“
Just then my grandpa Katsuhito appeared from the crowd behind me and said “I think it’s time for you to say bye to your new friends Tenchi.” Not being surprised since my grandpa always finds me when I wander away. I said “Hi grandpa! I defeated my rival and brought honor to the Masaki family!“ Katsuhito: “If you say so Tenchi. You know your grounded for quite some time for this.” Bopper Jr. having regained his composure defiantly declared “You may have won this round, but the next time Bopper Jr. is gonna rock you out!“ And with that the Bopper gang disappeared into the crowd. I went back to Japan with my grandpa and he didn’t tell my parents what I did since they would probably schedule regular time with a child therapist and then, grandpa couldn’t train me when he wanted.
I decided to make an A.I. to help me learn to play guitar. Djinn: Oh you mean me? Why thank you Jackie boy! Tenchi: “Must you call me that?” Djinn: Well yes it’s easier for a guitar with a British accent to say.” Anyway my grandpa said I wouldn’t be playing anything until I learned violin first. So basically, I got my first real six string, bought it at the 5 and dime, played it till my fingers bled, was the summer of um... 2009. Djinn: “First of all, that story was bollocks! Second, It was 2004 not 2009!” Tenchi: “Yeah well that rhymed better. So dear readers who kept reading past the gumdrops song, thank you for hearing how I got my guitar Djinn. Djinn: “And this is Djinn formally apologizing for this humiliating tale. And now we leave you with these words: “Be excellent to each other, and party on dudes!
THE END
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